TL;DR At times, it can be intimidating to think that your partner is more successful than you but at the end of the day, you’re in a relationship and share your lives. You will both see each others’ successes and failures. Whenever you feel this way, focus on achieving your own big or small wins.
Making a relationship work requires a lot of time and effort from both parties, but what if you are in a relationship with a successful person? This only means that you may handle things differently regarding your relationship.
Having a successful partner is great, but since they are usually busy, it is hard for you to spend quality and intimate time with them. It takes a lot of patience, considering how they balance work and personal life. Having a more successful partner than you can also lead to insecurities, particularly if the woman is more successful.
Men, by society’s standards, are usually the ones who provide, but the age when women have the same opportunity as men change everything. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology suggests that men feel uncomfortable with a more successful romantic partner.
But being with someone more successful than you don’t define how your relationship will work. Here are some tips for how to better handle a more successful partner.
Be Their Best Support
Consider yourself and your partner as a team. It doesn’t matter who earns more; what matters most is that you and your partner are on the same boat navigating the waters of life.
Be their best support, be there when they need you, and be the rock they can lean on. How much money you bring into the relationship doesn’t define your worth. You can provide other things for your partner. You can cook for your partner, and make them feel secure while they are busy at work. Simple things that you can do to support your partner.
Even the most successful people need support. Let your partner know and feel how much you trust and believe in them.
You and your partner have differences, but in a relationship, you set aside those differences to make things work. It may be a little different when you have a more successful partner. Accepting that your partner is more successful than you is one of the most important keys to the dynamic of having a more successful partner. They may earn more, but that doesn’t mean you are less of a partner because of finances.
You are your person; don’t let the success of your partner dull your identity. Create your path; this way, you could have a meaningful thing to spend your energy on. Valuing your differences complements your relationship with your partner; you are not dependent on them, and you can work on your own goals while being there with your partner.
Let Them Be Your Inspiration
Sometimes we need someone to inspire us. Sometimes we take inspiration from our favorite athletes, how they have overcome the odds, or from someone who turned their life for the better. But who better to inspire us than the one we are with every day, your successful partner?
Let their success be your inspiration to achieve your own goals. You and your partner are a team that supports one another in life. Don’t be jealous of the success of your partner; instead, be happy for them and get inspired by it. Your time will come, and when it does, your partner will be by your side also. Nothing is more fulfilling than knowing you are inspiring someone to be better, and knowing that it is your significant other that you are helping makes it even better.
Communication is a big key in every relationship. For it to work, you need to communicate with your partner, including the hard stuff. Finances are one of the more sensitive topics when you are with a successful partner. But having to talk about how you would handle both expenses will help ease any tension that might build.
Communication will help strengthen your relationship; this will help you establish how your dynamics work with each other. So always have time to have a conversation with your partner, especially when you feel that there is a shift in how your relationship is going. Avoid being defensive when talking about accomplishments, and be honest and respectful to each other when having a hard conversation. Remember that this is not about who is more successful but about making the relationship last.
Your partner is the person who will always stick with you, regardless of what accomplishments you both have. This is the person who sees you for who you truly are and will always be your supporter. Taking care of your relationship to make it last is your priority in life.
Ego, jealousy, and insecurities sometimes get the better of us but keep in mind that your partner’s success doesn’t reflect your shortcomings. Be proud of them and clap for their accomplishments. Your time will come, and I am sure they will do the same for you.
Visit our website for more articles from Dr. Krysti (Lan Chi) Vo, MD. She is a psychiatrist, speaker, and advisor that specializes in making people a better version of themselves.